Dengan rasminya saya menutup segala kisah di dalam blog ini…
Mohon ampun dan maaf atas segala apa yang mengguris perasaan…
Lupakan cite lama.. selak lembaran baru…
hijrah ke http://harihairi.blogspot.com/
mungkin jua akan menutup akaun friendster ini sepenuhnya..
terima kasih..
1. New Year New Job
Bye 2008, welcome 2009, may it brings blessings and prosperity (teringat plak Prosperity Set McD yang memang confirm aku takkan makan sebab Mumu & Cham kata pedas gilergh)… 2nd January I’ll be having my first day at work in Islamic Banking & Takaful Department, what awaits I do not know, but I know I am equipped to go through come what may. No matter how tragic riding a motorbike had been a taboo to my dear mom, she had to allow me ‘rempit’ all the way from Cheras to my office, delaying my gratification to have own car somehow I loved my bike a lot, you knoe… Some asks how come I got post as Senior Exec so fast? Waiving two major steps as Junior Exec & Asst? I dun have the answer.. maybe because I did pretty well kot masa interview, according to Alia and Mahathir from HR Dept, they overheard Dato’ was happy with me. That was a bless, Alhamdulillah 
Maknanya aku tak sia-siakan one shot time interview. Thanks to Abang Lan for prior advice, and also Daud for comforting my nerves breakdown prior to the session. Mana taknya? Sampai 7 panel interview aku, mana tak chuak. Ekceli I dun really mind mana Department pun HR nak letak aku ni, asalkan I got a post there, adding into account some countries had fallen into recession, some anticipates, while Zeti was confident we’re not expecting any, I won’t put my position in complacent zone. Meaning to say I am grateful to be given any post in such a prestigious institution and I consider myself lucky enuff.. Thank you God, and mak, you can sit down and eradicate any form of unnecessary hesitation and kebimbangan yang berlarutan… Now it is my turn to serve you. And 2009 is a year to differentiate a boy and a man.
2. My Cousin is a Celebrity
Do you remember I’ve told you once that male descendants of Allahyarham Haji Abdullah Reppin can play guitar, inheriting his talent in playing Ghazal + one of them is a hardcore drummer? Yes, our hardcore drummer, who happened to be a drummer in two indie bands in Perak, had been offered a recording contract! All of us were thrilled and happy! Congratz, Obe-Wan-Kenobi! I dunno, once my indie fren told me that a true indie people would stick to indie world, meaning to say by jumping into the lime light, you are out of the stream. But for me, if you got a fair chance to put forward your music to be cherished by the whole nation, then why not? Hehe… still remember, the look on my sister’s face when I got home one day having ayam sekor potong 12 on my right hand and Majalah Media on my left together with her car keys.. Sejak bile nko baca majalah Media? I answered: Obe’s in it, with the rest of this band members, one full page siot! Haha… Again, congratz! And also I remembered being offered an intro performance for Reza Salleh (an Indie song composer and performer) by one of my friends Fadza. ‘Offer’ here not in the sense - “Hey Hairi! OMG! You are so damn talented! You should be performing in Reza’s nite!” Actually ‘Offer’ here in this sense - “Hey Hairi! I dunno you can play guitar. If you want to perform in public I can get you to perform as intro to Reza’s in No Black Tie”. At first, I was really thrilled! I mean, the only chance I could perform in public was in Fara’s Wedding. But at that time I was not confident playing and singing at the same time, my mulut and my hands just could not collaborate sync. I asked the other, can I just sing with minus one instead? They laugh and said “Kidding? Unless your minus one is the song that you compose by your won, we would say go ahead, if not, then forget it.” I wonder why.. Then they told me, indie world is all about talent in song writing and playing intrument. If you dun have both, just some cute Dafi face singing other people’s song, you should go to AF or IOAM, they even have this one term for this people who sing cover song by minus one - “cover song performer”.. wah gelaran ni bagi aku best jek… but for indie people, it is a name given to this-guy-can’t-play-and-dun-write-own-piece-of-s***, or lebey kejam - poser. Kalau nak kena gelak pegi ar.. kalau ada yang jerit sokong nko pun member2 nko jek… Sounds cruel to me, but that’s the reality. So I waive such a chance. Maybe next time.. huhu..
3. Best Supporting Role
I got offered by Articulate Prod. (orang kata Ramona Rahman punya) a supporting role in a local drama series to be aired by RTM1. If they offered me extra role senang je la aku tolak… bukan sebab aku pandang rendah role extra, tapi sebab aku da nak keje, lain la kalo aku still student.. lagipun time aku study pun penah je dapat extra role, payment takde la berapa masyuk and time consuming… shooting sampai 2 hari tapi payment RM45… cam tak worth nak ponteng kelas… apatah lagi nak ponteng keje untuk RM45? This time I was offered a supporting role, according to Encik Nizam, Supporting role ney will appear more than one episode… so kira time consuming gak la.. payment belum dirunding.. tu yang aku kira hesitate gak sama ada untuk reject or to accept.. besides, I only got experience on stage performances, not on camera.. after careful deliberation, I decided to waive the offer… sebab baru nak keja kan, takkan sebulan baru keje da nak mintak bos cuti seminggu dua nak shooting.. gilo apo? Akak aku cakap amek jek la kalo ade duit.. one way betul… but acting is an art… if I decide to do art on money basis, then it would not be right.. I somehow agree with this saying:
” Seni itu sesuatu yang diperjuangkan. Barangsiapa yang menggunakan seni untuk memperjuangkan diri sendiri dia ialah pelacur seni”
Apa-apa pun, welcome 2009. Aku doakan tahun 2009 membawa kita rahmat daripada Allah, dan kekuatan untuk kita face any challenges. Amin.
Al Kisah maka tersebotla keysah ari ni ari Jumaat, 12 Desemeber, bersamaan berapa ar kalender Islam, aku tatau, pe nak jadi, aku ditakdirkan ke medical check up untuk keje dalam Bank Negara, Owh yea, pada member yang aku tak sempat nak gtau, aku ditawarkan post Senior Executive Department of Islamic Banking & Takaful Bank Negara Malaysia. Alhamdulillah… tapi tapi tapi tapi aku lom la nak canang dengan yaqen sebab ada satu prosedor yang vital, even kalo anda di offer ganti Kak Zetti tapi anda tak lepas prosedor ney, you can say bai bai to Bank Negara - medical check up… and malangnye aku kantoi medical check up tadi… ngong tol..
Medical check up untuk tujuan employment ke, sambung study ke.. ada mende yang korang kene take note agar tidak jadik cam aku… contohnya:
1. Pastikan mereka yang tidak biasa/tidak suka/benci giler/boikot/tiada pengetahuan apa itu seluar dalam, korbankan segala ketidak selesaan itu dan pakailah kerana ada sesi membuka keseluruhan pakaian kecuali seluar dalam… bayangkan jika anda tidak berseluar dalam hari itu… horror!
2. Bagi yang pakai lense, pakai jek la spek jap… tapi aku special case sebab spek aku patah… kena pakai lense…
3. Okay yang paling penting, elakkan makanan manis or whatever yang tak sehat sebaik-baiknya tiga hari sebelum… sebab aku minum air F&N Oren semalam, so ketika urine test, aku tak lepas sebab kandungan gula tinggi… so doktor bebel sket n suh aku datang balik esok.. takke bwang masa je..
Sekian…
While friends at my age had successfully moved on and lead their life at a higher stage, I decided not to grow up and be a man coz life offers so many excitement and luxurious enjoyment that would be severely murdered by maturity. However, time cruelly flies each second, a clear indication it never really favour my decision. As time goes by, I realize that there is a need to grow up and I reluctantly let go. My life as a student had officially ended, and I am at the verge of entering into the realm of real responsibility.
All the sorrows, sadness, betrayal I encountered previously are actually nothing compared to the outside world, where it really involves my dignity and ability to support life and family. No more working hard to prove potential, the world demands what I have; it is the time to give. I hate this but Lala Land is only meant for Peter Pan. Duh…
For who I am today, very much molded by people that I’ve met. I could not hold my head up high because I would be nothing if I have not met them. They left a mark deep in my heart, and they are still a part of everything I do. Thank you is inadequate. But only God can reward you. Amin.
Through out the journey, I’ve met various people. Love some hate some. People come and go. Some I thought would last, but they have walked away. Some I thought would be a so-so friend, turned out to be among the closest. Some grudges managed to be reconciled while others lost the points. Anyway, like the song goes – In the end everybody hurts. And for that, deep from my heart, sincerely and truly seek forgiveness from all of you, who had been hurt by my actions, words, or writings. Some of them I did not even realized. Some of them I did it intentionally because I was of the opinion that I was hurt by you. But still, being hurt by you was never a fair justification you deserved to be hurt back by me. Truly, I am sorry, I apologize.
I wished everybody luck in whatever you are doing, praying for the best for you. Do pray the best for me too. Amin.
I wrote from heart with all honesty and sincerity,
Mohd Hairi
1. Today ada session photography dengan robe convo so cam smart le sket gi kelas berbanding keselekehan seperti biasa dengan selipar lusuh nak putus tuh. actually robe aku dah hantar ke rumah, so thanks to Marina sebab bawakkan jubah Hajar, patutnya aku thanks Hajar dulu sebab virginity of her robe telah dihilangkan oleh aku hehe.. thank hajar… speaking of robe, batch aku akan merasmikan jubah baru yang menggantikan jubah lama yang telah digunakan selama 23 tahun. Ada yang kata cantik, ada yang kata buruk. Bagi aku, takde lah cantik gila, tapi takde la buruk sangat sampai takmo pakai. Pape pun, kte tetap kena pakai gak masa convo tu. While some others may concern more on the look of the robe, apa yang bermain kat benak aku lately ialah nasib aku ketika convo… tetiba cam tangkap sayu plak tgk jubah tu. Tu yang aku hantar jubah tu balik Shah Alam sebab tak mo tengok kat bilik. Jubah tu remind aku to my late father yang tak sempat nak witness aku amek scroll. Few nites ni I am reminded of his face, the way he always asked me "Bila ko nak abes", and keluhan besar yang dilepaskan oleh nya, cara dia menggelengkan kepala… barulah aku sedar itu semua are his indications that he was of no confidence that he would make it to the day. It’s true… He won’t be around on the day I wear my robe. Unlike orang lain, aku takkan dapat cium tangan dia pun or even saying thank you for all his efforts nak besarkan aku sampai berjaya… Two years ago, at this dates, dia dah tak dapat buka mata, and dah tak dapat bercakap seperti biasa pun… it has been two years… I kept telling myself, even he won’t be around, aku tau dia bangga dan bersyukur dengan kejayaan aku ni, walaupun tak hebat mana…al fatihah..
2. I brought back the robe, hand it to my mother. She took it and she cried. Becoz my father could not make it to the day. Aku sangat tersentuh time tu tapi aku mengumpulkan segala kekuatan untuk remain compose. aku kena strong, terharu juga dengan effort mak aku siapkan itu dan ini untuk hari convo aku so that everything would be perfect. Dia kata dia tak sabar nak hang gambar aku amek scroll kat dinding rumah untuk completekan semua gambar anak-anak. Berkat usaha penat peluh mak bapak aku, kami empat beradik kesemuanya merasa dewan konvokesyen. To some other people, takde benda extraordinary pun, la… konvo je. But to us, it means a lot, raised by a typical postman and a full time housewife, it was not as easy as yours. thanks, mom..
3. fikiran and emotion aku tambah terganggu bila aku discover mak aku ada infection dalam rahim dia. she didn’t tell me personally maybe sebab malu. akak aku yang beritahu. Aku bgtau Amal, mak dia pernah sakit yang sama dan rahim mak dia was removed the moment it was discovered. But my mom, dia dah sakit mende tu even since my father was with us. Selama ni doktor dok ingat sakit gastrik… rupanya rahim dia… aku sangat sedih dan sangat bimbang… aku serabut… hoping for nothing serious… ntah! malas nak pikir! korang doakan la everything would be okay…
4. I can laugh I can smile… tau nape? sebab member2 aku ada untuk back up and diverge the atmosphere kepada sth yang lively, lawak, happy, fun, sibuk… ada je mende yang wat aku terlupa seketika, even aku tau aku akan terganggu semual b4 tdo… almost every nite kteorang akan menang meja terbaik kat NZ tu, siap cantum 3 4 meja n gelak besar sampai orang lain seme usha… ala… orang lain seme dah kenal kteorang pelanggan setia NZ… aku sangat appreciate these people yang sentiasa buat aku happy and appreciated. Aku sangat bersyukur pada Allah that I am blessed with these people. they care for me and they love me ever since. Kalau takde diorang time camni aku rasa mesti aku weak gila… aku doakan Allah pelihara lah mereka semua macam mana mereka jaga aku time2 macam ni…
5. Aku rasa cam aku dah move forward… tapi lately ramai plak people from my past emerge semula. Contoh Kak Dayang, she reminds me of that good old days yang tidak akan ada galang gantinya. She wished for the days to return even for a moment. Aku pun tak tahu possible ke tak. Masing-masing dah successfully bawa haluan sendiri. Memang aku tak nafikan what we had before was among the best I had in my life. But I believe me n Kak Dayang can create sth new and more cherishable since to bring back history pun cam tak possible. I dunno… Kalau ada rezeki, boleh la kami semua duduk semeja, even our laughter was not as loud and was not as sincere as before, just to honour the sincerest moments we had before…
for the good things, ameen..
I haven’t been writing for quite a long time, so many things had happened to me, as it had happened to all of us everyday. Those things forced us to grow up, if we are to learn. Of all the pain and sorrow we’ve dealt with, believe that God has bigger plan ahead of us
I went to Mentari Project Tuition last Saturday with Keeya. Actually I’ve registered as a volunteer at the beginning of this year but never had the chance to actually go there and spill my love. Okay, basically Mentari Tuition is a tuition for kids who came from families who are unable to afford normal rate tuition fees. In Mentari Project, all they need to do is to pay RM10 for materials for each kids that they send. If they send 2 kids or more, they are only required to pay RM20.
Other familiar faces to me are Munie, Kak Fadh, Kak Farhana, Abang Tam. They had been asking me to drop by every weekend but I never had the chance. When Keeya came to me one day in AIKOL and told me that she had also registered as a volunteer and had never been there, we’ve decided to go last weekend. With her ‘kereta kecil warna merah’, we drove all over from Gombak to Desa Mentari and met all 30 young hopeful faces. We had fun teaching those kids… walaupun kadang-kadang aku cam naik darah gak bila aku ajar diorang memain.. ye la, budak budak kecik sekolah rendah…
Benda yang aku nak share dengan korang ialah… aku realize satu benda. aku ni dah study duk kat uia ni dah nak masuk lima tahun. Apa achievement aku? Teater, debate, counseling, mooting, advertising, modelling.. tu je? Itu pun aku rasa tak puas and nak lagi itu dan ini. And paling hina sekali ialah bila aku rasa diri aku macam loser dan tak berguna sebab tak successful macam kawan-kawan aku yang lain. Bila ada time terluang, aku dok meronggeng lepak sana sini, tgk wayang, karaoke, bowling, makan2 ntah banyak lagi ah. Kalau ikut time macam sekarang ni, aku tgh dok shopping sakan kat OU, Midvelly, KLCC, Sg Wang sebab tengah sale mencanak-canak (btw, Esprit tengah sale up to 80%). In the end, aku tanya diri aku, apa contribution aku pada soceity? agama? bangsa?
okay, dengan hanya masuk debate, teater, counseling, manage to get awards jadi champ, I do inspire kids to be a good debater. cukupkah? or sebenarnya motif aku masuk bukan really to inspire kids, tapi tekejar-kejar nak kumpul title champ? and for the record aku tak penah champ pape pun.
dengan join Celcom Metro Modelling, ada la charity project here and there. Again, cukup ke? Besides, aku tak buat mende pun, duit seme celcom yang provide, aku just datang duduk dengan anak-anak yatim and makan sama-sama… contribution dari aku? less than 2%! aku tak puas.
all I can say, aku dah jadi selfish selama aku blaja kat U ni. all I can think of is how to be great. How to be the best. Bila tidak menjadi begitu berjaya seperti yang aku mahukan, aku down. Tolonglah… ramai lagi orang kat luar tu yang bukan sahaja tak fikir how to be the best, malah tengah struggle nak menempatkan diri dalam masyarakat agar tak tertinggal kerana kesempitan hidup.
Seeing those hopeful faces, Mentari Tuition proiject really had touched me. Kalau korang ada kelapangan, come and help them . They need us.
1. First congratz to the only lady who can control 12 Angry Men, Puan Direktor, Tini and husband, Syakif for you wedding. Semoga bahagia ke anak cucu. Took us an hour to arrive to your house. Lagi dua hekor Munie and Shan memang tak boleh harap langsung dalam keta tuh. Sama je sesat barat. Hehe… and Shan, it was a great reunion la for the belakang tabir wedding people… only Acap je takde… And it’s great to actually meet up dengan casts yang lain, tapi sekejap sangat sebab diorang pun dah nak balik…
2. Second, hmm.. aku tak taulah serius ke tak, memanglah orang kata mimpi ni mainan tido, tapi bile dapat yang sama, cam scary jugak… mulanya awal short sem ni bila aku pindah bilik aku… every nite aku akan dapat mimpi seram… ada ‘benda’ yang offer untuk menjaga aku… siap pujuk lagi… kononnya sapa yang buat dajal kat aku, dia nak balaskan… and siap convince lagi, best sebenarnya kalau kitaorang ni berkawan… bley jadi best fren… kalau sesama manusia nak la aku… cam waris jari hantu dengan Jangan Pandang Belakang plak rasa… tido malam je la aku kena, tido siang takde… bila aku gi tido katil rumet aku yang lain, mende tu tak kacau dah… so lega la sket.. rupanya belum abis… kat umah aku kena lagi the same dream.. aduh… terus tido dengan mak aku… and ada mimpi tu aku siap dah bersetuju nak berkawan dengan ‘dia’ and dia akan ready je untuk protect aku… part of me kata mende ni silly je… just a dream… tapi kalo byk kali aku rimas la… kalo lawa takpe gak… macam nak rawat tradisional tapi aku tak kenal orang la… maybe sebab aku tido tak cuci kaki kot…
3. Upcoming activities takde la byk sangat, tapi tak confirm… kalo confirm baru aku tulis. Neway, ngantuk ar..
Ciao… Jangan Pandang Belakang.
I’ve just walked out from the Cinema Hall 3 of GSC One Utama, the new wing and I’ve walked out with more satisfaction and excitement. I give it 3.98 - Dean’s list confirmed.
Synopsis: Kisah perebutan takhta di sebuah daerah berhampiran Narnia - Telmarines antara Raja Miraz dan Putera Caspian. Putera Caspian terpaksa melarikan diri ke dalam hutan Narnia untuk mengelakkan daripada dibunuh. Dalam sesi kejar mengejar, askar diraja ternampak makhluk Narnia yang dipercayai telah pupus akibat serangan Telmarine berjuta tahun dahulu. Maka kerajaan Telmarine telah mengumpulkan bala tentera untuk menyerang Narnia. Meanwhile, Peter, Susan, Edmund & Lucy telah dipanggil semula ke Narnia untuk membantu.
Aku suka:
1. Scene pertarungan individu antara Peter & Raja Miraz yang sangat menchuakkan!
2. Betapa gracefulnya Susan ketika berlawan. Dahlah bibir dia seksi.
3. Strategi ala-ala Perang Khandak yang digunakan oleh Narnian memang tak diduga langsung! Superb!
4. Kecomelan makhluk-makhluk baru yang ditonjolkan.
5. Scene pahlawan-pahlawan Narnia yang terperangkap di dalam castle dan dibunuh helplessly memang sangat touching.
6. Scene pokok-pokok pun dok attack jugak.
Aku down:
1. Part Lucy jumpa Aslan, orang tengah dok perang bagai, diaorang siap bley gurau-gurau lepaskan rindu plak…
2. Aku tak rasa best sebab Narnian people macam tak ramai n tak nampak variation. Logiklah sebab ramai dah mati time perang.
3. DEvelopment character yang lebih teliti berbanding Narnia 1. Watak Peter, Susan dan Lucy memang dikembangkan dengan baik. Edmund sahaja yang kurang menyerlah.
4. Slanga Prince Caspian memang aku suka. I like!
Senang cakap. Gi la nengok. Worth it. Even kalo korang tak penah tengok Narnia 1. Aku kat dalam wayang tu sambil tengok sambil explain. huh.
Well, right now I’m spending some time for short semester, but not taking any subjects since none are offered. So I decided to revise Islamic Banking, prepare for future. Poyo jek. Ntah ntah dok kuar je tiap-tiap hari. Nothing much had happened. Interschool Debating Championship 2008 had ended, I am satisfied with my result, indeed God has given me ample reasons to smile. Eee.. can’t wait for jamming session with my band next week. Buh-san gak bila takde kelas nih.
Anyway, I wished to share words of wisdom - Let It Be. Sebenarnya tajuk lagu the Beatles yang last. I got to know this from a performance by an AI contestant, Brooke White who sang it on the first top 12 show. I love the song so much and somehow got connected to the story. The message of the song is whatever it is, in the end, you just gotta LET IT BE
1. We had planned it perfectly, we’ve taken precautions and caveats, yet it did not turn out to be the way we imagined it to be. Macam member aku sorang ni nama dia Faiz, dia in charge untuk year book Law Grads 2008. She had done almost everything under the sun untuk pastikan year book lebih bagus from previous years. She searched for the lowest price offer, and ada banyak gilergh masalah timbul, and she managed to overcome them tanpa menyusahkan Atun. Tapi in the end, year book tu spoilt jugak printingnya. Dan ramai orang bising year book tak berkualiti dah lah bayar mahal. Then I told Faiz, just face it. Dia dah buat macam-macam yang sudah termampu, but the situation just out of her hands. Dan dia dah tak mampu buat apa-apa. Bukannya dia tak cuba. In the end, Faiz, you gotta let it be.
2. One person had done something so bad or spread something unpleasant about somebody. Yet a friend of yours backed him up for the sole reason - He/She is among their group. He/She is his/her friend. Be that person commit rape, sexual assault or whatever evil existed under the sun, the criminal is their friend. But when other people commit the same, they are the one who stood up against it. (For the sole reason - that other people happened to be NOT their friend) This is something we can’t comprehend. We tried to fix it. Futile. Face it! Mulut dan perangai sesetengah orang memang cam p*****. And they have friends who value them sooo much that and do not mind what he did or he said to others. They are meant to be best buddies. In the end, no matter how grevious we are hurt and devastated as the victim, we know we gotta let it be.
3. We had done a major favor for somebody. We helped them when they are in need or even without being asked. We covered their a** when they are fucked up. Does it worth it when we got replies - "Apa-apa jelah." "Huh, wuteva." Serius kita rasa cam tak berbaloi apa yang kita buat selama ni. Rasa nak pedajal semula pun ada. Then I learned, in the name of love of humanity, just carry on doing what we had done previously, helped them, cover their a**es, do whatever it takes. Kak Maz told me once, "Hairi, when you love a person or a thing, love it unconditionally." Yes, it is true. Nothing much I can do to make people realize and value what had I done, and they are free to say anything - "wuteva" or "pape je lah"… the reward is from God anyway. I just gotta let it be.
4. A superior valued and treasured selected people. Malang sekali bila kita yang tahu siapa ’selected people’ tu sebenarnya. Kat depan superior bukan main hipokrit lagi. Berbalas-balas testi, salam cium tangan, asking stuffs like they care. Tapi kat belakang, standard la dok mengata, create speculation, drawing baseless conclusion. And kita yang menyaksikan keadaan ni. We could just tell the superior the truth. Tapi deep down inside, kita tahu tak worth it. This is life. Some people had to bermuka-muka to survive. Besides, nothing much we can do. Let it be.
5. A friend of yours is overprotective. You are not at liberty to do anything. If it goes against his desires, he will treat you like a piece of shit. Apa lagi aku nak buat? You asked yourself. Dah banyak session we’ve talked our hearts out. Let it be.
The maxim Let It Be works on me. Nothing much pun yang aku boleh buat. Masa makin suntuk untuk aku. In the end, I know I gotta let it be. Serahkan pada Allah untuk tentukan. I missed those good old days, but they had successfully and happily move on and not turning back. Seems like I turned around to see history too much that I just forget to let go and move on.
May peace be with you.
